The Official Monster Raving Loony Party

Thank goodness for The Official Monster Raving Loony Party and their local candidate in the coming General Election, Lord Toby Jug. Without them British politics would be so serious and boring .

They follow the normal political theme of having splits within the party. However, their splits are generally based on arguments about how silly they should be.

Can’t help thinking there’s something peculiarly English about a party who’s manifestos have contained the following satirical gems…

  • Abolishing income tax since it was only meant to be a temporary measure during the Napoleonic Wars
  • Putting Parliament on wheels, requiring it to sit throughout the land and thus negate the need for regional parliaments
  • Introducing a 99p coin to save on change
  • Allowing drivers to go straight across roundabouts when there’s no traffic to make driving through Milton Keynes more fun
  • Giving MPs expenses to the poor and needy so they can waste it instead
  • Dedicating pogo stick lanes on routes to work
  • Having a thirteenth month of the year to get completed all those little jobs that never get done

And how about the tradition of candidates changing their names by deed poll to something more interesting, for example Tarquin Fin-tim-lin-bon-whin-bim-lim-bus-stop-F’tang-F’tang-Ole-Biscuitbarrel, or R. U. Seerius.

In spite of their wackiness the Party has had occasional success in its 47 year history. The founder, Screaming Lord Sutch, originally stood in 1963 as a candidate for The National Teenage Party to highlight the hypocrisy of teenagers being denied the vote (the minimum voting age at that time being 21 years) whilst at the same time being able to serve and die in the armed forces. The voting age was reduced to 18 years in 1970.

A colourful character, David Sutch was a musician who suffered from clinical depression after the death of his mother Annie in 1998. Sadly he took his own life in 1999. His showman spirit lives on through the manic performances of The Official Monster Raving Loony Party candidates throughout the country.

Bit of a disaster on the allotment yesterday. Having spent hours chipping away at the square fence posts I had for free so they fitted inside the water piping of the fruit cage (to be), as I hammered the fourth post into the ground the trimmed part snapped off! Had sawed too far into the post when preparing it. Oh well, thought I, I’ll put the tubing up on the first two posts hammered in on Monday so I can take a photo to show today. As I grunted and groaned over pushing the second end over the trimmed part… it snapped off too! Now I’m a bit stuffed. Do I trim the posts again while they’re in the ground, or do I just pay for some fence posts? See photos of problem below.

Did have some success… managed to make a bug bedsit as shown below. Biggest wish is for some rain. We’ve had nothing but a five minute light sprinkling in three weeks so nothing is growing very fast at present.

Sammy and Connor had a few hours on the plot on Saturday to make improvements to their den, involving the usual laying of heaps of planks against the existing structure. Disharmony broke out when Sammy wanted install a refuse chute which Connor didn’t agree with. Ten minutes later and some water and piping, all was forgotten and they were into team working.

Think I’m becoming the Peter Pan of squash… beat son David twice in the past week and we’re level pegging on scores to win this month!



  1. Re your post problem...
    Cant you drill them out with an auger bit and insert lengths of broom handle or summat similar ?

  2. Thanks for the suggestion Zeb... I tried chipping to six inches worth of wood to go inside the tube while the post was in the ground. Wish I'd done it on the first place! Much easier to chip the post in that position, & much easier to hammer post in before chipping! Looks like having twelve inches inside tubing was just too much strain on the wood.


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